Posted by: janedb | April 15, 2013

Treatment Delay

I was home after 21 days and finally pain free. I had my youngest son overjoyed to see me, but my eldest had retreated into himself. I knew seeing a death had shook him but I hoped he would talk to me.

On a visit whilst I was in he had also witnessed a cannula being removed and the vein not stopping bleeding. I had to ask mum to take him home as he looked like he was going to faint. It had happened before and I knew it needed pressure and the limb putting in the air and it would eventually stop. My low platelet count was affecting my clotting. I also made APML ladies daughter go green. I was not in pain and was laughing about the situation, the bed was covered in blood and so was my paper. I phoned him later to tell him I was fine.

It was not until I was home that I realized quite how ill I had been. I was sent home with a copy of a   letter sent to my GP and there it stated I had E-coli. My eldest son was frightened that I was going to leave him and I think scarred that he would have to go back to his father. I joked with him that after everything I had had I was like Captain Scarlet, indestructible. This made him laugh. Then I managed to convince him that if the worst happened my parents would not let their dad get hold of them. Social Services would stop my ex anyway as they were involved at the beginning. It took some time but he finally came round.

He scarred me at first as he had anorexia nervosa symptoms and was saying he was fat. He is over 6 ft and has a 30 inch waist with 33 inch legs. It took time to turn him round but I also got crafty by buying treats he likes and putting them where he could find them. He also was not drinking so I told him he was going to end up with kidney failure. He was warned because of his previous medical history he has to look of himself. I need a cow now as he drinks a pint of milk at one go. I’ve condensed this but it took me 6 weeks to turn him around.

I felt well for the first time in months which was a strange feeling and began to get out. I still chose places and times that would not be busy. On Friday 6th February I was able to go and see my youngest son’s school assembly. It was surreal as the children could not help looking at me. I had covered my head with a scarf and was wearing glasses, but my black eyes were still very visible underneath. His friend asked him if his mother was wearing glasses or had black eyes, when he answered both, she looked at him as if he was mad. His head also gave me a hug and so did a friend. His head is not a women you would expect to hug you.

At the clinic on the first Thursday after my release I was told I had had septicemia and as my blood count was not as they would like it they would be putting back my next lot of treatment. I also needed another bone marrow aspirate and was booked in for the following Tuesday. This upset me as I had been hoping to have all the treatment over with by the end of January and back at work in April. Everything was now behind schedule. What I had to remember was I was still here.

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